Holly T. Ashley

Oh did I type that outloud?

Safety Plan


(480) 442-4816

Personalized Safety Plan

The following steps represent my plan for increasing y safety and preparing in advance for the possibility for further violence.

Although I do not have control over my spouse’s violence, I do have a choice about how to respond to him/her and how to best get myself and my children to safety.

If I decide to leave, I will: _______________________________________________ (practice how to get out: What door will you use, windows, elevators, stairwells, or fire escapes).

I can keep my purse and car keys ready and put them (location) _____________________


I can trust _______________ with this information and request that they call the police if she/he hears suspicious noises coming from my house.

I can teach my children how to use the phone to contact police, fire, and 911.

If I have to leave, I will go: ___________________________________________________________

I will use _____________________ as a code for my children, friends and/or family to call police.

If I have to leave my home, I will go to: _______________________________________________

I will also tach some of these strategies to some or all of my children.

When I sense an argument, I will move to a low risk area such as: _____________________________________________________________________________________

I will make an extra set of car/house keys and put them: _________________ so that I can run out the door if needed.

I will make a notebook that contains the following documents: Birth Certificate/naturalization papers, House papers/Lease, Bank account numbers, checks, credit cards and/or numbers, social security cards, marriage certificates, passports, Keys, List of medications, welfare identifications, money, medical records, address book with passwords, etc., pictures (make copies of yours and the abusers – this will be most important when filing for protection orders), School documents, immunizations, and: _____________________________________________________________________________________



I will open a checking/savings account for myself, in private that only ____________ will know about.

I know that my cell phone has a retrieval system for phone calls that I make – therefore, I will contact my service provider to let them know I need to block this information from my abuser (an OOP might be needed). Or I will get a “burner” phone or establish new service to use after I leave.

When I leave, I have established where I will go by calling these people/places to make arrangements: ______________________________________________________________________


I have established my safety plan and will get a friend, family member or advocate rehearsing it with me each: _____   day_____week____ 2x/wk.

I WILL rehearse this with my children**.

**If you have small children or fear that they might be tempted to let the abuser in on your plans… rehearse this plan as a means of “escape in case of fire, burglary, home invasion, etc.” in a manner consistent with “As seen on TV” type program.

Safety first!

Change locks on the doors (This can ONLY be done after an OOP has been filed).

Install security systems: window dowels (cut wood to place in windows to prevent opening), cameras, etc.

Purchase rope ladders to hang out windows for easier exits.

Install smoke detectors and fire extinguishers for each room in the house.

When I feel that an argument is coming on and cannot leave, I will go to ________________________ room in the house, because it is safe. (Not the kitchen or bedroom where there are guns, knives or weapons, Not a room without a window for an easy escape – living room, family room, garage, somewhere where you can get out if the situation escalates).

I will NOT be afraid to call 911.

I will give notarized documents as required to give permission to schools, medical releases, etc. for the following people to pick up my children from school or to give medical treatment (Names/Phone numbers):





When the offender has left and the OOP has been filed, I will notify my friends, neighbors and ___________________________ to call police if they see them around my home, the kids school, our church (you might have to attend a different church for the time being while they are being disciplined by the church or if no church discipline is taking place).

I will file an Order of Protection. I will have them served and I will give copies to everyone that I believe will help to keep them away from me and my family.

I will check to make sure that my order is on the registry. The telephone numbers for the county and state registries are:

County: ______________________________ State: _______________

If they violate the OOP in any way I will call 911 immediately- BEFORE calling anyone else.

Working or doing daily duties (taking kids to school, shopping, etc).

I will move if at all possible.

I will take a new route to work/school/etc.

I will change the kid’s school or home school, etc.

I will keep my cell phone on me, charged and on at all times.

I will take a new/different route to the store, church, school and work each day.

I will not leave the house after dark or at dust when I would have to return home after dark.

I will NOT call, text, email or have any social media contact with the offender at any time, in any way.

I will delete all social media accounts (including my children’s) – DON’T JUST HAVE THEM BLOCKED! They will set up a new account and “friend” you another way or ask their friends about you… it is best to DELETE them ALL!

I will develop my exit strategy with: _________________________________

I will practice my exit strategies: the argument, the escalation, the exit.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: