Oh, did I type that outloud?
I loved it when I heard your voice.
As you slipped into bed beside me- in your rambunctious way…
Climbing over me to wake me in your “subtle” way…
as you giggled…
I miss that giggle!
I touched your pretty hair, it was so soft…
I forgot how much I missed the smell of your shampoo.
And to hear you giggle again.
I couldn’t believe you got into the house and wondered for a moment how you got a key… but it didn’t matter, I was just glad you were there.
I heard the alarm, but hit the snooze…
I knew what it was, but I hit it again.
I didn’t want to wake up,
In my dream, you were about to wake up the baby and I wanted so desperately to see her –
it had been so long…
Does she even know who I am?
I couldn’t wait to touch her…
I wanted to hear about your life…
Before you went away again… because you always seem to go away.
You never seem to stay for long.
And then I go back to missing you…
I miss you so much.
How long will it be Lord, how long?
Will she ever know who Nana is? Will I ever hear her little feet run through my house?
Will she hug me and give me kisses?
Will I touch my little girl again? Will I hear her voice say “I love you mom.”
Will I hear her giggle and make funny faces?
How long must I wait? How many holidays must pass?
My heart aches so badly.
I miss them all so much.
I don’t want to sleep – I do want to sleep… I never want to wake up
if that is where they are.
“Hope deferred makes the heart sick…” (Prov. 13:12).